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Getting Through The Holidays During A Divorce (Part 1)

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Getting Through The Holidays During A Divorce

The holidays should be time of joy and family gatherings. While going through a divorce has profound effects on one’s outlook towards the holidays with the proper outlook and planning it is possible to enjoy the holidays even while going through a divorce. During the holiday season we will be providing some helpful tips to ease the stress of the holiday season.

Money Woes

If you are in the process of getting divorced or are recently divorced money is likely to be tight and the thought of accumulating additional debt over the holidays can cause significant stress. If you can, start a "present fund" that will cover the gifts you need to buy. If not, seek to avoid incurring debt to put gifts under the tree. Think outside the box. Make coupons for the kids for stocking stuffers like "No Chores for a Week," look for sales and most importantly, remind your children that the holidays are about family time and not gifts.

Traditional traditions

As your family takes on a new structure it is a good time to create new traditions. Sit down with your kids and ask how they want to spend the holidays. Begin by taking a piece from each child and share your own ideas of how to spend the time together and come up with a new tradition that you all can enjoy.

Co-parenting Christmas

When you spend a holiday with the children remember that this means that the other parent spends the holidays without the children, if not totally alone. Take the kids shopping to buy that parent a special gift to give when they see that parent next. Also, be sure to have the children call the other parent or drop by his or her house for a special Happy Holiday pick me up. It will help the kids, the other parent and, most importantly, co-parenting relations! Few things will limit the cost of your divorce more effectively than maintaining a good relationship with the other parent.

Have an adventure

If your budget does not allow for a Christmas extravaganza, pack the kids and the car and have an adventure. There is no need to drive far or stay in an expensive hotel – just be together and make this family time the gift of a memory that will last a lifetime.

Bring the party to you

Rather than wait for invites from friends or family bring them to you. Invite your children's friends and their families over, or a group of other single parents with or without their children for a party to watch the parades, let the kids play and enjoy the holiday!


If you're disconnected from your family because you spent the holidays with your ex-spouse's kin, now is the time to reconnect with yours. Whether you have the children or not, take this time to spend the holidays with people you love and who love you.

Fun for everyone

Involve the kids in all of the planning or decorating for the holidays. From the baking to the hanging of the lights, if you are doing it with your children, you will all have more fun and create new traditions at the same time. The holiday plans and decorations do not have to be perfect – just have fun.

It's all in the attitude

If you are positive and upbeat, then you will have a wonderful holiday. Do not allow the thought of the holidays to beat you down. Take care of yourself and your kids and think positive. Keep yourself centered and remember that what matters is who you are celebrating with and not how you are celebrating.

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Guest Tuesday, 23 July 2024